Desolate

After a devastating divorce that left me penniless and homeless, I thought I had hit rock bottom. I lived alone in the woods for a year struggling to survive, I was mentally and emotionally shattered. Then, during a walk in the country I met a man who offered me a ride back home...that's when the real nightmare began. For two weeks he wooed me, was everything I ever wanted. (What I didn't know is that he wasn't; who he portrayed himself to be). I fell in love with who I thought was a dream come true, but actually walked right into his trap. 7 years of escalating abuse and sadism followed. It started with verbal abuse, then came physical and sexual abuse. He screwed the doors and windows shut, took my shoes and phone so I couldn't escape. Torture always followed. The times I escaped he paid people to help him find me and drag me back. Police and orders of protection deemed useless. He manipulated community and law enforcement. I suffered a severe beating being dragged through the woods, an attempt to kill me, broken ribs, bit off some of my ear....brutal. He had my grave ready for my body. I suffered from dissociation, upon "coming to" I was standing over that grave. And somehow I was able to pull off a dangerous plan of escape in my state of mind. After the escape I had to face myself.....looking in the mirror was more than devastating. I had no idea who I was looking at. I mourned for that woman that I used to see in that mirror. But survival was only the beginning of my journey. I was able to recognize and understand how Predators choose their victims, the psychological manipulation tactics, how it escalates from abuse to murder, and how badly the systems fail vulnerable women. This book is both my story of survival and a guide to recognizing the patterns that could save lives. If you've ever wondered how someone gets trapped in an abusive situation, how Predators operate, or how to rebuild yourself after trauma shatters everything you knew--this book will give you answers, hope, and the knowledge that survival is possible.