Finally Secure: Practical Skills for the Anxiously Attached to Find and Keep Love Without Losing Themselves (Attachment Theory)

Move from anxious relationship patterns to secure behaviors with effective research-based attachment theory tools and methods.

Attachment theory explains the different ways people reach out to each other for connection and how they get tripped up. Secure and insecure attachment styles occur on a spectrum, born from the early messages a child receives from their caregivers, both explicitly and implicitly. When anxious attachment develops, it often creates a need for reassurance from others rather than from within.

Whether dating, in a long-term relationship, or recovering from yet another painful breakup, those with an anxious attachment style can learn the skills to find validation and meet their own emotional needs without needing to pursue their partner for comfort and compromising or losing their sense of self. Written by Maria Vogel, a family and marriage therapist who once struggled with push-pull relationships, Finally Secure is a practical guide that offers a clear, supportive path for anyone who identifies with an anxious attachment style and wants to feel secure in love.

Inside, readers will find everything they need to start building the emotional security they’ve always craved:

• Tangible skills and real-life exercises to shift from reactive to intentional responses in love and conflict with the goal of building self-trust and a sense of stability
• Step-by-step strategies for navigating dating, long-term relationships, and breakups to cut toxic push-pull cycles
• A trauma-informed approach that helps you understand why they feel what they feel—and what to do about it
• A self-paced journey to becoming truly securely attached, grounded, and resilient in love