Growing Up Saved: When Loving God Feels Like Losing Yourself

What do you do if the faith that raised you seems to fail when you need it the most?

Kristen LaValley grew up a church kid through and through. She said “the sinner’s prayer” before she could write her name—and spent the next few decades trying to prove she meant it; in a body that couldn’t rest, with a mind she didn’t yet understand, under a God she was afraid to disappoint. She learned to perform the kind of faith that got praised: one that hid pain and swallowed questions.

But in the thick of depression, spiritual exhaustion, and a late ADHD diagnosis, she found herself wondering if the faith she’d built her life on could really hold her.

In Growing Up Saved, Kristen maps the slow undoing of a faith formed in certainty and what it took to find God in the middle of her unraveling.

In these pages, you’ll find authenticity, empathy, and compassionate theology as you explore:

• how to find your way through a faith that was formed in fear
• the intersection of trauma, mental health, neurodivergence, and spiritual identity
• the healing work of making peace with your body, your mind, and your story
• a path for those navigating life after disillusionment, burnout, religious trauma, or pain

This book isn’t a call to give up on faith. It’s an invitation to hold it differently. With tenderness, grit, and humor, Kristen offers a hard-won way through grief and grace to a messy, holy rebuilding.