You Are What You See: How My Favorite Shows Became My Worst Influences

Entertainment was never just entertainment… It was instruction.

From the sleek hallways of Constance Billard to the rainy corridors of Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital, Doménica Feraud—like so many of us—was raised by TV. It was her greatest comfort, her most passionate obsession, her favorite form of therapy. Her childhood friends were cloaked in laugh tracks, her mentors monologued under stage lights, and her ideas of love, sex, power, beauty, and self-worth were shaped frame by frame.

But what if the stories that comforted women also misled us into becoming shells of who we were meant to be?

In You Are What You See, Feraud peels back the shiny veneer of pop culture to uncover the deeper truths encoded in our most beloved media. With fierce intellect and unflinching vulnerability, she revisits the onscreen moments that taught her how to exist as a woman, how to eat, how to please, and how to love—for better or for worse. From the subtext of sitcom banter to the seductive manipulation of office romance, she reveals the quiet violence of cultural messaging and the radical possibility of unlearning it.

A bold blend of cultural criticism, personal narrative, and feminist inquiry, this essay collection invites readers to reclaim their gaze and rewrite the stories they've been told about who they are. For every feminist who ever crushed on a problematic character, every person shaped by reruns, and every pop-culture devotee ready to challenge the status quo, You Are What You See is a mirror, a reckoning, and a call to demand more from the media that shapes our world.